Monday, April 30, 2012

Does This Sound Familiar???

I received a touching response from one of my readers.  She was brave enough to allow me to share her story. We both felt that it might touch and inspire some of you.  Thank you so much for sharing!!!! Here are her words:

OMG! Your story is so similar to my story. We did some traveling cause of my husband’s job. We moved from SA to Louisiana, Georgia, Houston, Indianapolis, Mississippi, now back home (SA). Every move was harder and harder. Houston was the worst for me. My husband travels from time to time still, but Houston was the worst. He would be gone 3-6 weeks at a time. I worked full time with 2 kids still in daycare. Talk about some emotional stress and stress packs on the pounds along with mess with your mind! Every move I started with thinking okay it’s a new place things are going to be better. New place new challenges, but like you I did nothing to meet new people or get out and do something for myself. Just keep the kid’s active is sports at soon as they turn 4 so I could meet new people. Sad I know, yes I meet new people, but I never meet new friends. I still felt so alone. Finally something snapped I started working out when we lived in Indy. Loved the YMCA and they had an awesome program and facility. One of my favorite facilities to this day! I finally started dieting and working out and the pounds came off quick, WOW…eating right and working out does really work! I felt great, I was enjoying my body and loving my family and making new friends. After being off work for a year I decided I wanted to go back to work. The stress of finances started to hit us harder and I was not finding time to work out was getting harder. Really, I was going back to work to socialize cause I was lonely being a stay at home mom, but I didn’t think out my income (vs) money going out? Taking a $10.00 an hour job with driving 65+ miles a day was killing us, plus my daughter just started Kinder (1/2 day), no daycare in the area would drive her to afternoon Kinder ? Now I was paying for extra gas to drive back to take my daughter to afternoon Kinder during my lunch breaks along for paying for 2 kids to be in daycare? Ouch! This was not the smartest move on my part. So here comes the depression again, I was Mean/Mad at my husband and poor kids could not do anything right, but I would not let any family members or friends from back home know my pain. Finally kids were in sports, making new friends in school and we were starting to make new friends and hang out with other families. Then here comes another blow! We have to move again. Didn’t work out I was still working full time with some traveling. I had found a job in Indy after my $10 job forced me to leave due to the low pay. I never was diagnosed or took any meds for depression at this time. Every move I found something negative and blame the new place why I was so unhappy. Then we started having trouble with my daughter behavior and anxiety issues. I thought it was all the moves affecting her or I was just a horrible mother. This was another stressor for me. When my daughter was in 2nd grade we had to put her in a 2 week outpatient hospital to help her deal with her anger issues. She was diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety. The doctor put her on meds. This trial was so hard the little things in life we take for granted about our kids. I cried and cried. I didn’t want to her to take meds. I wanted my child to be normal. We really didn’t have much choice. Her behavior was better and her grades were better. My daughter and I both began to see a therapist and at this time she wanted me to start taking meds for depression. I refused and told her I would start working out since this worked for me before in Indy. I would give it try again I knew I could lose weight . My problem was I did not have that drive or want to work out or diet at home by myself. I just could not find the perfect work out place like the YMCA in Indy. I was still working full time at home and traveling some with 2 kids now in school (kinder and 2nd). I was still struggling even with a break when the kids were in school during the day. I had trouble just getting the house clean. All I wanted to do is sleep! I always thought that my mood swings and depression were my lack of family and friends from back home (SA). One day out of the blue my husband receives a phone call for a job interview in SA. I was so excited! This was my chance to be happy again, to be around family & friends. I pushed him to go see what the job was all about and what kind of money they would offer. My husband had been with his company 5 years thru 3/4 moves and great quarterly bonuses. “Why would we want to move he would tell me”? Tired of my nagging he called this new company up they flew him into SA for an interview. He liked what he saw and a week later he had an offer on the table relocating us back home, my home (SA). The pay was more without the big quarterly bonuses. I didn’t care I just wanted to move back home. So, we made the move back to SA. Nothing changed other than I saw my family and a few friends very seldom. It was not the same or what I thought. I kind a thought my life would pick up where I left off. Everyone had moved on with life without Angie and I still felt alone and isolated and still working full time from work. About 6 months after being back in SA. I decided to quit my job to spend more time with the kids and to be a true soccer mom. By this time my kids were heavy active into sports and had something going on almost every night. I also finally made a doctor appointment to get established and it was time I started taking care of me! When the doctor walked into the room I was a big mess and just started balling. Right away said, “I need you to take some meds to help with my hormones”. I started taking them and went back 2 weeks later for a follow up. I was feeling better. I asked her “How long did I have to take these meds”. She said, “The rest of your life”. She explained about how during my cycles the hormones period/ time cause my anxiety and with anxiety comes depression. I was scared and didn’t want to gain weight with meds. I had heard these types of meds would make me gain weight. This was the reason I refused the 1st time they were recommended to me. I’m now better today cause of these meds. I recommend to anyone who think they need a little help from meds may do not be afraid or embarrassed to take them. Believe me! Your family will thank you. I’m a nicer person, mother, wife and friend. I still have self-issues about my weight and my family and I are going thru a huge trial in life right now, but I’m able to handle it better cause I have help (meds) and of course I found God about 1 ½ ago and what a difference God had made in my life. The peace of his love is so real. I also started a boot camp in Bulverde in December which has so much helped! Then starts our life trial and another move, but this time it’s not to another state. Just to the other side of SA. We are now in Floresville, TX moved From Bulverde, TX. I’m struggling with getting involved at the kid’s school meeting new people. I was so involved at our last school. I feel lost and the BIGGEST struggle for me right now is the motivation to work out on my own and looking for another boot camp family like the one I just left and location around south of SA. I drive from time to time to Bulverde to still get a good work out in and to see my friends I made and miss so much!

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